THREE STAGES OF ELUSIVENESS by Sabiha Zeynep Cesur

THREE STAGES OF ELUSIVENESS, 2024

by Sabiha Zeynep Cesur

“Living in a metropolis like Istanbul, I often find myself surrounded by strangers yet deeply alone within the crowd. My creative process grows out of those quiet moments of reflection. This work was written during one of my evening commutes. Whenever words or images start flowing into my mind, I stop everything and begin to create. My process is purely instinctive, guided by emotion, and rhythm of the city around me. This work explores how hope evolves through illusion, betrayal, and rebirth.”

Sabiha Zeynep Cesur (1996) is a Turkish self-taught artist and poet exploring surreal narratives through digital collage and poetry. Her work intertwines visual and emotional realities with dreamlike imagery, often reflecting on themes of identity, the psyche, and society. She has been featured in Pratfall Magazine and exhibited in two group shows in Istanbul.

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Stage I: Delusion of Hope
Maybe you were the pink roses,
and I was a fool....
Perdóname, mi amor.
I could recognize you with my soul
but my eyes were blinded.
Distance got me tied up, and gravity drowns me.
You don't know, there is nothing left from me either.
Yet my heart is still blooming with your melody.
How come I ended up smiling with my eyes again?
Is the right song playing or are my purple tinted tunes just lonely?
Time will show me.
Ocean has the answer, and the beach will witness.
Wine will be the dancer to the songs you will be playing.
And finally, I figured it out.
All my poems were written for you.
Now I see it.
Maybe you see it too.
Stage II: Bitter Taste of Betrayal
Time showed her,
She was just a lonely siren
with her crown made with fresh daisies and roses.
Neither the ocean had an answer, nor the beach witnessed.
Angels’ wings shadowed her heart suffering from a fever,
Like she was overwhelmed from a sun-like sickness.
She was restless, tired of being treated like a mistress.
Mindless gazes were always staring at her figure, especially at her curves.
They believe they were making her nervous
or nauseous…
She knew that her bravery was their weakness.
In parenthesis, it is indeed making them desperate, but mostly helpless.
We all knew that their actions were heinous, poisonous and definitely tasteless.
Matter of fact, they were rather shameless.
She had to admit to herself that the bitter taste of their lies made her a great actress.
But this was tiresome, it was more likely to be pointless.
Because she knew that this sensual persistence does not go well with their so-called chivalrous mannerism
Yet, she was still willing to dance around the fine line between their mischievous tease and dismissive behaviorism.
Stage III: Tint Purple in Elusiveness
Painkillers and wine...
They don’t take the pain away.
Caffeine doesn’t make me stay awake.
I can’t get out of my bed.
There is just numbness
and where is realness?
Feelings are lost in translation,
but they are still scratching the surface.
Those shameless faces are begging for forgiveness.
Although I don’t want to travel to darkness,
just because I am dark too..
I want to do it while I still have my shine with me
with great joy.
Tell me what’s the point of more darkness
if I, myself, am already dark.
Dying is so easy when there is nowhere to hide.
Some lavenders whispered life is worth staying just for a little while.
Daisies said it is okay to hold on to me.
Pretty wind caressed my skin and people said I’m just alright.
Sunshine kissed my lips.
Moonlight wished away lying sunflowers.
And I ran away
so that I could breathe.
Rains of April danced with me.
And, I, finally, was ready,
ready to shine
so that I can set forth to this elusive realness.
But, dear magnolia, can you hold my hands
just a little bit more?
Maybe you can cure this soul-torturing loneliness.
After all, curiosity is another way to harness hope.